My new wallpaper and reprogramming

Isn't she beautiful? this piccie came from Ne Plus Ultras blog which is one of the many incredible fatosphere blogs I have had the pleasure of discovering recently (more on this later, I am just dying to rave rave rave!) I am blown away by this, she is FAT and BEAUTIFUL... at the same time! not only that but she is NUDE in a FASHION MAGAZINE for THE WORLD TO SEE. Did I mention I am blown away?

if only some one had shown me these type of images when I was a young adolescent I may have avoided some serious mental illnesses but that's a story for another day. THIS is what there should be more of in magazines and the media, THIS is what should be considered 'common' (after all, 'normal' is relative and thin do people exist too) THIS is what I want my children to grow up knowing and accepting.

After 24 hours of having this as my desktop picture, I feel like I am being reprogrammed, like I am starting to realise that body diversity is about as real as the glands on my chest. I looked in the mirror this morning and felt normal, I looked at photos of myself and instead of cringing and looking away, I accepted that it was me and didn't think anything of it. My mind is changing, I am reprogramming, I am accepting reality, I am becoming more critical of what I am told is right and real and I am speaking out for myself and the 99.99999% of other people in this world who are pathologised, shunned and made to feel like something is wrong with them because they don't have a socially and patriarchally constructed ideal body shape. I am ready to believe. I am FAT and I AM FUCKING AWESOME.

How does your garden grow?

Up until getting my Star Cloud for Christmas 5 years ago (happy birthday for the 29th Baby!) I was drastically unable to keep anything alive, plants, fish, even cactus died in my care. Cats are relatively easy but recently we have been considering a new addition to the family and after spending an hour in the aquarium shop watching the baby turtles I know what I am asking Santa to bring me for christmas. Turtles, however are a lot of work and I need to be prepared for this, so recently I decided to try the plant thing again to see if I had the skill to maintain and care for more living things. So far this has been a great success, and I am particularly proud of my herbs and salads so I thought I would give you a looksie at some of my horticultural efforts

Here we have some lettuce, baby spinach, basil, mint and parsley. The herbs are out of control and the lettuce and baby spinach is growing at a steady pace miraculously in partial shade, I'm hoping to get a nice yield out of those before they go to seed again

My happy little lettuces and spinach get a lot of love and care :)

Star Cloud enjoying the daisies I potted for her

So this is my garden and I must say I am very proud of myself, since quitting smoking it's nice to have a balcony that can be used for living things and growing food rather than discretely poisoning myself. When it's finished and in full bloom I will update :)

So what's the deal with Miss Universe?

"We, the young women of the universe, believe people everywhere are seeking peace, tolerance and mutual understanding. We pledge to spread this message in every way we can, wherever we go”…. In a bikini

Today in my fluey haze I realised that for the last 45 minutes I had been gazing at the television completely blank at what appeared to be a very backwards old fashioned beauty pageant. It was Miss Universe 2010.

Firstly, a little history on Miss Universe, the pageant started officially in 1952 and was orchestrated and owned by a clothing company, Pacific Mills. It was bought by Donald Trump in 1996 and to this day remains one of the most shallow and backward spectacles of mythical femininity in the western world.

If you really think about what Miss Universe represents, you can understand why not much has changed since 1952. Although the pageant now accommodates for a brief interview as part of it’s judging process, these women, from all around the globe and in some homogenous way, representing their countries, are judged for the way they look. Wake. Up. Modern. World. Are we still here really? Are women really still valued only for how they pull off a bikini and evening couture? Have we not learnt anything in the last 50 years? It seems to me, when I look at these ghastly displays of patriarchy and superficial values that the hard work of Simone de Beauvoir, Betty Friedman, Namoi Wolf and Judith Butler was all in vain. Are we not listening?

But what can we do? To this day Miss Universe has 600 million viewers worldwide, I know it’s easy to be sucked in by the pretty lights, sparkly costumes, cheesy hosts and beautiful women, or perhaps like me this morning we are mentally switched off and don’t know what it is we’re watching. Perhaps it’s time to think critically again about these things, perhaps we need to continue the war that was waged all those years ago. We need to open our minds to what is still considered acceptable, make some noise and engage in public debate about it.

Yes I know it’s a bit of fun and the ladies look lovely and blah blah blah. However, I cannot imagine bringing up a young girl in a world where superficial beauty is still valued over intellect, compassion and humility. It has to change. And as long as there is a Miss Universe pageant with swimsuit and evening gown segments instead of community involvement, academic merits, and worldly achievements being the focus of worth, women will never be valued publicly for their hard work and intellect, and as usual, the 96% of women who do not look like Miss Universe will never be worthy of a crown in our backwards society.